why these myths exist

Rape is an act which is totally controlled by the perpetrator. During rape a woman's right to be self-empowered and sexually self-determined is completely denied. Our sexuality is fundamental to our sense of ourselves and such a violation takes away the control we expect to have over our bodies and our lives.

Everyone has ideas about what rape is - who does it to whom and why; and women who have been raped will be affected by whatever preconceptions they themselves have held about rape as well as by the attitudes of others they come into contact with.

Often women will go over in their mind, things like, 'I accepted a drink from him....', 'I refused to have a drink with him....', 'I shouldn't have gone on that second date...', 'I invited him in for coffee...' and find a way of blaming themselves; but since when was meeting for a coffee, or having a drink an invitation to rape?

If you have always thought of rape in terms of strangers in the street, and a friend or partner rapes you in your own home, it may be hard initially even to recognise that what happened as rape.

By talking with other women who have experienced sexual violence about our experiences we can validate our own reality and release ourselves from the myths that surround us in society.

Rape is not only an individual experience, but it is part of a much larger pattern of the power relationships between men and women.

As it is, many women are left in a position of being on their own dealing not only with physical effects, but also feeling isolated, angry, guilty, and full of shame but also surrounded by myths and prejudices that deny their reality.

Are rapists motivated by sex?

Men who rape do so to secure power and control. Men who rape children do so to secure power and control. Rapists are therefore motivated by power and control using a forced sexual act to achieve this is just a way of gaining power - not a way of gaining sexual relief.

Does pornography lead to rape?

Studies show that of the 200 million people online at any time between 25 to 30% are using pornography sites. The only words entered in search engines more often than 'sex' are 'the' and 'and'. At the time of writing there were more than 400,000 websites worldwide that offer child pornography, which is illegal in every country in the world but despite this there was a 345% increase in child porn websites in a 5 month recorded period in 2003 ( Cornwall Rape and Sexual Abuse Centre).

There are differing opinions on this issue within society.  However, in the majority of pornography, women are depicted as the passive image and men are in control of what they use that image for. This form of inequality may lead to some men wanting to replicate that power relationship with real women, not just images.

Research has shown that exposure to 'extreme' pornography increased risk of developing pro-rape attitudes, beliefs and behaviours, and committing sexual offences. Although this was also true of some pornography which did not meet the extreme pornography threshold, it showed that the effects of extreme pornography were more serious. Downloadable document available at www.justice.gov.uk/docs/280907a.pdf

Except for the minority of people who think that you should show anything, including rape - everyone supports some form of censorship. Therefore, it is not a question of being for or against censorship; it's about where you draw the line and why. Why should one censor? Take advertising as an example. If advertising didn't work, multi-national companies would not bother spending literally millions on advertising their wares. If the adverts have an effect on society and the buying public, then we are entitled to assume that pornography will also have an effect.

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